Long Weekend Roundup

Sacramento Kings Wins: 6, 7, 8

The plate of crow, and the cost of seats, is getting a bit outrageous.

Bango the Buck

Lucky for Bango, he doesn't have to go on road games. The young lefty looking to upstage the most exciting thing in Milwaukee does. Advantage: Bango.

Actual conversation had between Spike and Charlie T.

CTH: "Did you see Brandon Jennings?"

SW: "No, what happened?"

CTH: "Double nickel vs Golden State and an 8-3 record."

SW: "Who else have they played?"

CTH: quickly googling the Bucks schedule and seeing teams like Minnesota, Knicks, GS, Nettes, Bobcats, Grizz "Uh, nobody really. Some real tests coming up though...@Spurs, @NO, Orl."

SW: "Well there is your answer. Talk to me in about a week."

Anybody on the Jennings bandwagon knows how that stretch played out.

Jay Bilas All-Stars: Anthony Randolph

My fantasy team (which is leading my league with a 27-9 record, a 6 game cushion over the second place team and coming off a 9-0 week all thanks to taking D-Wade with the first overall pick) is in a dilemma. I log on today to calculate my lead over the rest of the league and I see a trade has been proposed to me. Derrick Rose (on my roster) for Anthony Randolph. Straight up. No filler, nothing. Just Rose for Randolph. Its an easy decision really, unless your league gets points for upside, second jumpability, length, and freakish athlete. You know what, I'm not so sure he even outmeasures Rose in most of those categories anyway. Sorry Chazzmichaelmichaels, The Adam Keefes are keeping Rose and his fantasy points. Good luck with those length points.

Weekend Roundup

Bango the Buck:
Scoring 55 points as a rookie is impressive, especially 8 games into the season. Brandon Jennings antics have just about upstaged Bango the Buck as the most exciting thing in Milwaukee, but doing it against the Warriors is about as impressive as this. I mean come on, he is using a trampoline.

Boston Celtics Countdown to 10 losses: 3
Mired in a two game losing skid to the formidable Hawks and Psycho T and the Pacers leaves RaSheed's prediction in doubt for the All-Star game let alone the entire season.

Sacramento Kings Wins: 5
Don't book that trip to Hawaii yet Spike, you might be using that money for courtside seats.

Atlanta Hawks - 'Nique or Keefe:
An 8-2 start with some really quality wins so far (POR, DEN, BOS) leaves us leaning 'Nique on this.

Sacramento Kings: Apparently Faithful Readers Of The Black Converse

It's a bittersweet moment today at The Black Converse.

Sweet because clearly the Kings are our most faithful readers and have used our unfriendly wager as bulletin board motivational material. And it's working. City of Sacramento, you're welcome. We're happy to spur your boys on.

Bitter because, with a W last night (led by...Jason Thompson? Who? [hitting Wikipedia. No good. Hitting ESPN.com's profile page. He went to Rider? He makes $2 million this year?]), the Kings are now 4-4 and waaaaaaaaay ahead of pace to stick Charlie T and me in the lower bowl of Energy Solutions Arena on January 29. Against our will, but true to our word. I believe I heard Charlie T say these words today: "Well, I've never sat courtside at a Jazz game before." Ugh.


Is this guy to Sacto as Paul Milsap was to Utah the last couple years? The secret you hope nobody (aka: Portland) finds out about?

In other Sacramento news, Kevin Martin (since we know you and your Kings are our readership), you may want to brush up on your understanding of Bill Simmons' The Ewing Theory.

PS: Thanks for reading, Kings. The Princes jokes will stop soon.

Win/Win or Lose/Lose

The Jazz are in NYC to face the Knicks, which means a win is a double win (a road win AND another loss towards the Knicks' lottery campaign) and a loss is a double loss (a road loss to a very beatable team AND another win against the Knicks' lottery campaign).

In a season where:

- the Jazz appear to be a very well-motivated hockey team (3 winning and solid quarters, lots of fouls. Come on. If there were no fourth quarter, this team would be killing it. Ah, but there IS a fourth quarter. And this team is getting killed.)
- the Jazz got a loss to a Kevin Martin-less team of misfit toys (potentially the tipping point to The Black Converse having to attend the January 29 Jazz/Kings game)
- the Jazz beat the Spurs on the FRONT end of a back-to-back
- the Jazz let Dirk believe his hair had Samsonian qualities
- the weak interior defense has led many Jazz fans to (silently) wonder what Greg Ostertag is up to

it's not too hard to see how a W against this particular Knicks team could be a bona fide must-win. Unless you're shooting for TWO lottery picks...

910 Conversation: Weekend Roundup

Psycho T Meter: 8
We promised to track the Psycho-ness of Psycho Tyler Hansbrough throughout the season as he tries to translate his college hustle to the pros. Due to a shin injury we have had to put this on the back burner until this weekend when he saw his first action.

In his first professional game he managed to find a way to dive after a lose ball into the stands. We also go our money's worth of Hustle Faces. All that adds up to an 8 on the Psycho T Meter. (see below)



Sacramento Kings Wins: 2, 3
We might have to adjust our wager at this point and change it to Jazz wins by the end of January. I thought the win vs. the Jazz was an aberration, but they backed it up by inching closer to .500 against the Jay Bilas All-Stars. We may be looking at courtside seats at this rate.

Celtics Countdown to 10 loses: 1
Minus the game against Orlando where they sent their "B" team, the Suns went 3-1 on a very difficult east coast swing. The Celtics on the other hand are lucky the Baby Wolves don't know how to finish a game or this would be the Celtics 2nd loss. 72 wins is still technically on the radar.

Memphis Thirtysomethings: 3
Rudy Gay drops 33 on the Clipps. This was without factoring in the Clippers handicap. So in reality he had about 17 which is a solid night. In other Grizzlies news, our favorite Thritysomething Allen Iverson will have to really pick up the pace to appear in thirty games this year.

Phoenix Suns: 1 (pending)
Though he hasn't quite gotten it, Shaq is currently working overtime trying to figure out how to steal this late career rebirth from Steve Nash. Hey Shaq, I might be going out on a limb here, but I doubt its in the Cuyahoga Police Department.

Attention, shoppers, K-Mart is getting shut down

With apologies to the original, er, second original K- Mart (Kenyon Martin), the new K-Mart is getting shut down for 6-8 weeks.

Given our wager with The Kings, this certainly makes 14 wins by January 29 less likely. In honor of that, I made a quick list of things I might be doing in Utah- rather than attending a Jazz/Kings game- on Friday January 29.

- Writing a thank you note to the country of Spain for recognizing the benefits of trading matador for matador. Carlos Boozer will have no trouble with the bulls and the NBA's first bullfighter Ricardo Montoya, if he keeps up that hustle, will have no problem finding Jerry Sloan's good graces.

- Night skiing with Robert Redford, who'll need to decompress after a long Sundance. We'll have our usual talk about Butch Cassidy & The Sundance Kid and how it was kind of his Catcher In The Rye and how sometimes he wishes he had more Salinger in him.

- Countdown the days until the Vancouver Olympics start while simultaneously watching the Raptors' plummet in their bid to become Canada's Team.

- Watch TMZ.

- Read some message boards about the last season of Lost, wish that ABC hadn't cast Juliet in their new show V because it kind of tells you how limited her role will be, speculate on Sawyer/Kate/Jack replacing Juliet in their love square with...Sun? But then it would be a pentagon, which would explain the government conspiracy...

- Drink the last of my personal hoarded stash of egg nog.

- Burn a couple candles for the Kings at the shrine for St. Lenny Wilkens, the NBA's losingest coach.

Big Night for the 910 Conversation Story Lines

CP3=KG: 1
We know its early in the season but in the game against Boston, CP3 showed some true frustration...and KG envy. A loss last night to the Knicks probably didn't help matters.

Memphis Thirtysomethings: 2

Last night was the first of many disgruntled performances from Allen Iverson, the thirtysomething darling of the Grizzlies. We put you as the first thirtysomething Allen not because we want people to know how old you are but because we knew this would mean a lot to you.
We did what you said, "Go look at my resume and that will show you that I'm not a sixth man," Iverson said. "I don't think it has anything to do with me being selfish. It's just who I am. I don't want to change what gave me all the success that I've had since I've been in this league." And you're right. You are not a sixth man, you're a thirtysomething man...and the first one in our books.
It was also the first thirtysomething point total by a Grizzly of the season, Mr. Zach Randolph. Mayo messed up his chance to be the first by trying to go shot for shot with Carmelo. (for those of you keeping score at home Carmelo's 40+ pt effort doesn't count towards TBC eating a Caramello...because it was against the GRIZZLIES...the same grizzlies who made Kevin Martin look like Kobe Bryant last night)

Sactown Race To 14 Wins: 1

The Kings are moving along at a 25% clip, right on pace to put us in the lower bowl right behind the Osmonds.
Something tells me this won't last.

TBC Smart Points for Daryl Morey: 1

@ricbucher tweeted last night after the Rockets pulled away from the Jazz that "HOU is a 5-man symphony"
We knew after last year they would be scrappy and win some tough games, but with Lil' Chris Rock leading the squad full time now they are looking mighty impressive.

Heat vs. Suns tonight

One loyal reader and Suns fan wrote in wondering if this is a preview for the 2010 NBA Finals.
One can dream...one can only dream.

The Pink Seats Aren't Exactly Beckoning. The Purple Ones? Even Less.

At 0-3, the Kings aren't exactly making us sweat our bet.



Meanwhile, the Knicks are right on schedule. They score FIFTEEN more points per game than Sacramento and still have a worse point differential. Wow. The Jazz could use somebody who blocks shots...UNC's Ed Davis might have that. Only 6 ft 10, though and we might already have a corner on the market of undersized bigs.

910 Conversation: Pacific Division

GOLDEN STATE WARRIORS

The truth is: any Don Nelson team has some intrigue. Any Stephen Jackson team has some intrigue. And, so far, any Stephen Curry team has some intrigue. Those are the facts.

Intrigue, if translated into the language of Jay Bilas, is upside, potential, intangibles. So we’re calling this Bay Area team The Jay Bilas All-Stars. Anyone who’s ever watched the NBA Draft or a college game called by Bilas has heard his staggeringly encyclopedic arsenal of noncommittal superlatives- great length, intangibles, upside, athleticism, recovery. We decided that these- the admittedly intriguing roster of the Golden State Warriors- are the kinds of players that inspire Bilas to run, not walk, to the thesaurus. We'll be looking for signs of Bilas-ness* in the Warriors.

*The irony that the two (arguably) most important players on this team (Jackson, Monta Ellis) never went to college yet the team is nicknamed after a college hoops aficionado like Bilas is unavoidable. But we’ll press on. I mean, we’ll tip some balls (Biedrins), make some hard cuts, bring some energy (Turiaf), provide instant offense (Curry), and hopefully have some good second jumpability if our first jumps fail.

LOS ANGELES CLIPPERS
Oh, the optimism that’s wafting through the L.A. air. Two teams that made the MLB league championships (may they rest in peace). Two teams that could make some noise in the NBA this year, with one sporting the ridiculously odds-on favorite for Rookie Of The Year. The praise is flowing like Botox. The hype is buzzing like a liposuction machine. This is L.A. to the seedy, heartless core.

But, underneath it all, people are nervous. They may not admit it; they may not want to even acknowledge that they’re denying it. But’s it’s there. The uneasiness. The doubts. They don’t trust anything that has Clippers written on it. And who can blame them? It’s a stench that won’t leave no matter how many times you scrub it. Players come to the Clippers with hope only to leave with “the stink.” Is this the season? Can Griffin & Co. become the official Exorcisers Of The Stink?

Well, to paraphrase ol’ Half Dollar, get wins or die trying. Our role? We’ll provide the visual aid. There’s one way to remove a stink with the potency and vintage of the Clippers' strain. Stay tuned this season to see if this year’s lucky Clips have the answer.

LOS ANGELES LAKERS

What's left to say about the Lake Show? Artest is a super interesting wild card in the mold of a more offensively-talented Rodman, which Zenphil has experience with.* Odom was a wise re-signing and looks almost sane in the formidably crazy shadow of RonRon. Their wing defense will be formidable as will their swagger. Gasol is by far the world's best Jar Jar Binks impersonator/power forward. Bynum is set to break out for the 10th straight season. They might miss Ariza. They might not. But their core is pretty wicked, as every prognostiblogger has said ad nauseum.

*I do have a theory that Artest’s uniform # (37) is not, as he says, a tribute to Michael Jackson, but rather a fittingly odd/backwards assertion of his goal this season: 73 wins. Break the record. Just this week, he was quoted saying that this team was one of the best ever assembled. If you think ambitious dudes like Kobe, Phil, Artest, etc don’t have history in their sights, you need to pay more attention to the cheesy X hat Phil wore after he broke Red Auerbach’s record. For their sake, I hope the pursuit of history doesn’t obscure their view of what it takes to just win the 2010 title. Maybe they should call Tom Brady, Belichick, et al for some pointers. Speaking of distractions **

**Hate to offer up the actual storyline in a footnote, but it does seem culturally appropriate. We’re going to track how often a Laker is a distraction to a Kardashian. Very simple. In fact, this is probably a good time to welcome my wife to the blog. She’ll be our Kardashian beat researcher. Like Jeff Tweedy, I have no reservations about her ability to keep us at least as in-the-know as those hacks at TMZ.

PHOENIX SUNS

I love Steve Nash. I do. Let’s just get that little tidbit of journalistic objectivity out of the way.

I’m bummed that his title hopes are probably washed away. This season, for the Suns, the only thing we’ll track is how many ideas of Nash’s Shaq rips off.

So far (retroactive justice): 1. The reality show that Steve Nash would’ve been infinitely better at. 2. Go to a rival team to get back at a former team that loved you but couldn't keep you.

SACRAMENTO PRINCES

So little faith do we at The Black Converse have in this year’s Kings that we are willing to put our money where our mouth is.

On Friday, January 29, the Sacramento Kings make their last visit to Salt Lake City. A ticket up in the cheapest seats starts at $10 but– after all the ridiculous tacked-on fees– is $21.50 per person. We’ll say the Kings get $1.50/win. So, if the Kings have won 14 games at that point (basically the midpoint of the season), we’ll buy the seats and weather a Kings game. To give you an idea of what they’re up against, last season they finished 17-65. A reasonable 11-game improvement (new coach, stay healthy, keep star happy) will shut us up.

See you January 29, Sacramento?

(In a further note, if they hit 20 wins by that game, we’ll buy the next tier of seats. 25 and we go lower bowl.)