Dear Pat Riley, xo- Carlos Boozer

Dear Pat Riley,

Enclosed you will find a set of multimedia materials:

- a DVD of my highlights from last night's Spurs/Jazz game at EnergySolutions Arena
- VHS and Beta versions of the same footage, because you're old school
- a quote from a reputed ESPN article that has Mehmet Okur saying, ""Everybody was active, especially from the defensive end," in which the term everyone must necessarily include myself and thus is a direct reference to my defensive activity.
- A screenshot of a few trade scenarios that worked on ESPN's Trade Machine.
- A box score that highlights my 27 points and 14 rebounds.
- A signed-in-blood covenant to always defer to Dwyane Wade and yourself.
- 3 complimentary cans of Dapper Dan hair pomade.

Sincerely,

Carlos Boozer