Monday, April 11, 2011

10 Things I Expect To Happen In The Next 6 Weeks

1 - That I will like the New Fleet Foxes record more than I will like the Western Conference Finals.
I messed up when I wasn't patient enough with Fleet Foxes last album and I wrote it off as "too boring." And the WCF will probably be Lakers/Spurs. Now thats boring.

2 - Derrick Rose will regret gunning for the MVP.
This might mean Wade and LeBron eviscerating him on the night he receives the trophy or it might mean he will run out of gas halfway through the second round (see also the 1987-88 Bulls). Don't count out Dwight Howard's elbows taking issue with it as well. We'll need a bloody face at some point to add some drama to the ABC promos.

3 - Mark Cuban on Shark Tank is going to be more successful than the Mavs postseason run.
And no, Shark Tank doesn't look good.

4 - If Heat/Knicks happens, we will see Jeff Van Gundy swinging on someone's leg again...somehow.
You think this sounds crazy now, but the apocalypse is already upon us.

5 - There will be one series in the Eastern Conference playoffs that is less exciting to watch than Butler/UConn.
And it will be Magic/Hawks.

6 - We will see Wade's 6th gear again.
We saw it at Marquette in 2003, in Dallas in 2006 and we'll see it somewhere in the Conference Finals. (Yes, this means I'm picking the Heat into the Finals...but you already knew that)

7 - OKC is about to hit their ceiling.
However far the Thunder make it this year, will be about as far as they ever make it. I will probably eat my words on this one, but I kind of get the feeling that they will become some hybrid version of the Magic and the Hawks in the Western Conference. They've made their step forward and we keep thinking they will make another leap but it never happens.

8 - Pop vs The Zenmaster will be the most cerebral coaching matchup ever.
So cerebral that they will actually take over Duncan's and Kobe's bodies at some point in the 7th game and finish the series by proxy.

9 - Everybody is going to win this year.
I mean the fans. This is likely the best Playoffs we have had since the 90's.

10 - Spike will spend more time re-writing lyrics for his Star Wars themed The Band cover band than he will watching playoff basketball.
Thats what happens when you're nursing a broken basketball heart. Thanks, Deron. "Moisture Harvest (Has Surely Come)" about moisture farmers on Tatooine doesn't quite do it for me. But I can't help but think that "It Makes No Difference" was on a mixtape Anakin sent to Padme before he knew she had died.