BFD

This video is getting quite a bit of attention lately, but not for the right reason. Everybody thinks that Biden was referring to some legislation that passed and was signed on Tuesday. The signing that Joe Biden was so excited about was that of me returning to the Cavs. See, I had been hanging out in Washington for the last couple weeks and I made a few friends. Who knew DC was so friendly to 7 foot Lithuanians? Among those new friends was none other than the pride of Scranton, PA.

That friendship had its benefits. I didn't have to spend my time at the local YMCA or some DC high school working on my game. I was in the White House every day balling it up with Joe and O (as they like to call each other) on the White House parquet floor. I was always on Joe's team because Obama had someone new playing on his team everyday; Brad Pitt, MJ, Bill Bradley, Barkley. But Joe and I were an unstoppable combo. We didn't lose a single game.

Thats why it is a big effing deal that I am returning to Cleveland.

When I got back to Cleveland and signed my new deal, LeBron whispered the same thing into my ear that Biden whispered to Obama. I'm glad he finally realizes it.

You know what I said back? Don't screw this up or I'm going to be playing in New York next year.

Its 5:37

23 to 6 might be a more appropriate way to say it since thats whats happening in LeBronland right now. He has confirmed that he will be changing his number from 23 to 6 for next season, apparently to honor Michael Jordan.

Someone might need to get LeBron a set of Basketball History tapes that date back before the he was born because 6 is just as important of a number for two reasons; Bill Russell and Julius Erving. But not too wax too nostalgic for a couple of legends, I'll take the time to speculate what this switch might mean.

Theory 1: He is going to channel Dr. J and grow out a 'fro and participate in the dunk contest. Likelihood: 3%

Theory 2: He wants to win as many titles as Russell and thinks that having the number will help him. Likelihood: 5%

Theory 3: He is going to play for the Miami Heat next year and the number 23 is retired there (Michael Jordan). Likelihood: 15% (he could have whatever number he wanted upon changing teams)

Follow-Up Theory A: He is going to play for the Chicago Bulls (MJ), Atlanta Hawks (Lou Hudson), Boston Celtics (Frank Ramsey), Houston Rockets (Calvin Murphy), or New Jersey Nets (John Williamson). All have the number 23 retired. Likelihood: 25% (again, he could have whatever number he wanted upon changing teams)

Theory 4: He is sending a message that he will hot be playing for the following teams that have the number 6 retired; Boston (Russell), Orlando (their fans), Philly (Dr. J), Phoenix (Walter Davis), Sacramento (their fans). Likelihood: 10% (again, he could have whatever number he wanted upon changing teams...and we already know he won't be playing for any of those teams)

Theory 5: LeBron secretly wants to be Kobe (though nobody can figure out why) and has decided that he is staying in Cleveland and wants to give his career a re-start a la Kobe Bryant when he went from 8 to 24. Likelihood: 50%

Theory 6: Back to the Kobe Envy Theory from above, he saw that Kobe changing his number made Kobe's jersey the highest selling jersey. LeBron wants to have the highest selling jersey so he is switching his number. Likelihood: 60%

Theory 7: Number 6 is LeBron's Team USA number and he wants to recreate Team USA in New York with Wade and Bosh. This is the first step. Likelihood: 45% (Bosh and Wade could just change their numbers upon switching teams)

Theory 8: LeBron is tired of Shaq getting all the media attention with his thumb surgery. Likelihood: 80% (LeBron is an attention hog, this story puts him on the front page and gets people talking about him)

Theory 9: He actually wants to honor Air Jordan. Likelihood: 65% (never take anything at face value)

Theory 10: Nobody really knows, not even LeBron himself. Likelihood: 95%

Mr. Big Z Goes To Washington

We figured since Big Z has been so gracious to us all season we should give him another opportunity to voice his thoughts to our readers, even though he is no longer with the Cleveland Cavaliers. Big Z, the floor is yours.

"I thought after this commercial that I was finally one of the guys and could start participating in the timeout photo shoots and the all-night poker parties at 'Bron's house. I also thought that being one of the guys meant I was going to get to finish out my contract with the only team I've ever known.



I guess I was wrong. But now I'm not sure what to do. My agent thinks I love Cleveland, my new team has no problem with me sightseeing all day, I'm still getting paid and The Commish is trying to keep me from being able to sign back with the Cavs (assuming I get released). I'm starting to think that this new gig isn't so bad. Why would I want to go back to the Mistake By The Lake? To Witness greatness? I know what thats all about. I'm witnessing greatness everyday as I make my way through the Smithsonian. I witness greatness on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial. Cleveland broke my heart when they sent me away...I'm not going to let them do it again.

Boston, Orlando...If you're listening...I am ready and willing to come teach you the handshake. Just let me finish the Air and Space Museum.

Z

P.S. You can only be Superman as long as you can fit into the tights. I don't make the rules, I just enforce them.

P.P.S. I know a lot of you have been getting some good laughs off my bald head being likened unto a Bullet, but just because I'm in Washington doesn't mean the Bullets are back."

Well there you have it....Big Z in his own words.

Big Z's Loyalty

Dear Cavs,

Before LeBron was even born I was playing for the Cavs. I was on the All-Rookie team, MVP of the Rookie Game and a two-time All Star. And lets not forget that I am the franchise leader in all time games played. I have been nothing but loyal to the Cavs my entire career.

But the straws may have finally broken my back. First, they deny me the chance to play for Lithuania in the Beijing Olympics. Next, they don't pass the memo on to my coach to make sure I get in the game to set the All Time Games Played record at home, in front of my fans.

Now, they are shopping me for "a big man who can stretch the floor with his shooting" and hope that I will get waived by the team they send me to, only to re-sign with the Cavs 30 days later in time for the Playoffs. I hate the thought of being traded from the franchise I have given everything to. Especially to some terrible team like the Wizards or the Warriors. Even more than the thought of being traded, I hate being traded for myself. How better could you describe me than "a big man with range"? I mean come on. If you want to trade someone with an expiring contract how about that out of shape back-up center you brought in during the off-season. Then you can have not one, but two big men with range and his overweight contract off the books as well.

I don't mean to tell you how to do your job, but for once I'd like a little thanks.

Big Z

GAINES!!!

D Will goes down.

LeBron goes off.

Boozer fouls out.

Candance Parker's brother misses.

Korver hits from behind the glass.

Candance Parker's brother misses again.

Z misses one too.

And then:

Korver is covered.

Memo is too.

Ronnie Price (who has a well-documented love for shooting when the clock winds down) too.

Gaines hits the first 3-pointer of his NBA career.

GAINES HITS IT!

Incredible game.

The NBA. Where 10-Day Contracts Happen.

Fueling The Fire

Apparently LeBron James thinks Michael Jordan is the basketball equivalent to Jackie Robinson.

I've got a different theory on the whole thing. It is widely known that the Miami Heat don't have much of a franchise history. To their defense, there is more of a history than some of the other teams that joined the league with them. That aside, the numbers hanging in the rafters are 23, 13, 33, and 10. Jordan, Marino, Mourning and Hardaway. The latter two make sense, the other two? Not hardly. Now that we have established that Miami has retired the number 23, lets bring Mr. James back into the picture and add this theory to the long list of "Where will LeBron go in 2010" theories.

LeBron won't be able to have #23 when he goes to Miami next season. If he can't have it then nobody can. Nobody.

Big Z in New York

We just got to the team hotel here in New York about an hour ago. We have a shoot around soon but I really wanted to get a few thoughts out about coming to the World's Most Famous Arena.

It has unfortunately been lightly documented that my contract is up next summer and I will be joining the free agent class of 2010. I have decided to use this blog as a way to get my thoughts and feelings out there as I prepare to make one of the biggest decisions of my life. Some other forthcoming free agents are overly protective of their thoughts on where they would like to play but I will be decidedly less so. Since the New York Knicks are on my short list, this is a good chance to let them know how I feel.

When I went to check into my room there was apparently a mix up with room keys. LeBron ended up with the keys to my room and I the keys to his. After we got that figured out, I was hoping to have a nap and/or watch some PTI to see if they had anything to say about my only trip to New York this year. When I opened the door I found a lot more than just a bed and a jetted tub. The room was filled with all kinds of stuff. A 2009 Yankees Championship hat and jacket, a letter from Letterman asking me to come by in the morning and shoot a top 10, dinner reservations to Momofuku, an Unlimited Cab Goldcard (not sure what that is), and a giant teddy bear wearing an I HEART NEW YORK Shirt. I took a picture of me with the bear to send to my boys and I'm hoping there is a way to send it to them without having to carry it on the plane. They guys will kill me for that one.

As I was looking through all the stuff I heard a cell phone ring. I found it in the pocket of the Yankees jacket and decided I'd better answer it. It was a guy on the other line and I think it might have been a joke because he said his name was something Z. He seemed kind of surprised that I answered but I didn't think too much of it.

Anyway, it seems like New York has me on their short list too. I'll have to swing by Donnie Walsh's office after the shoot around to thank him for all this stuff. If he is trying to win me over, it sure is working.

Alright, I'm off for now. I can't wait to high five Spike and maybe get a minute to pitch an idea to him. I think Big Z Working Hard would be a great documentary. I mean, nobody realizes how hard it is for someone my size to go through life; shopping for clothes, getting on airplanes, walking through doorways. I hope he goes for it.

-Z

See Big Z's other posts here

Guest Blogger: Zydrunas Ilguaskas

As part of our season-long 910 Conversation, we've enlisted a few guest bloggers to chime in when they feel moved to do so. Breaking the guest-blogging ice today is the Cavs' biggest (ok. tallest.) 2010 free agent, Zydrunas Ilguaskas. The floor is yours, Big Z.

Thank you, Spike. It's a pleasure to blog here. When ESPN declined to send a documentary crew to follow the exciting twists and turns of my pivotal year of impending free agency, I was sad. ESPN2 declining was also tough. But when Sport!!!Channel!!! from Lithuania declined? I hit rock bottom. Thank goodness for The Black Converse, giving this story a place to see the light of e-day it deserves.

Many have asked how The Big Z is coping with The Big Aristotle's arrival. I stick by my initial statement,

"I was just reading the news. That means I'll probably be coming off the bench."

I'm not going to get all Iversonian about it. Does it affect how I look at 2010? Yes. Do I still get paid the same amount? Yes. And, as anybody who knows the Z knows, it's all about the Benjamins.

Even as an all-star, I can accept a bench role when an all-time, Hall Of Fame player like Shaq is brought on. What is harder to stomach is:

the current technical free throw situation.

Of course, Lebron should shoot if he's on the floor. But, somebody else is currently 0-4 over 5 games. Now, if that somebody else were Shaq shooting and missing, as absurd as that scenario is, I could accept it. But my proficient free throw shooting ability is being overlooked for a guy named Boobie? BOOBIE? Who, make no mistake, has made fewer of these technical free throws than Shaq would...

In my next contract, there's gonna be a No Guys With Stupid Nicknames Get To Shoot The Technical Free Throws Over Me clause. I have my pride.

Also, Spike, no matter what you say, I do not look like this:

Spike note: Yes you do, Z. Yes you do.

910 Conversation - Central Division

Chicago Bulls

Derrick Rose, fresh off his rookie season where he won rookie of the year and then took his game to another level in the playoffs, decided he needed to get back to his roots a little bit. So when the invitations came out for the Rose Family Reunion, he naturally thought it would be a good way to do just that. He loaded up the Bentley and headed out to the family farm in Iowa and luckily for you, through a family loophole, we happened to be there for the weekend and followed Derrick around while he caught up with family, got advice from distant relatives and most of all got in touch with his roots. Throughout the season we will drop small excerpts from various conversations had at the Rose Family Reunion.

Cleveland Cavaliers

If you don't know all that has gone on in Cleveland this off season and all that might go on in the future, I'm not sure why you have read this far. So with all the hype and expectation in Cleveland, we have teamed up with the biggest free agent of the summer of 2010 to give us an exclusive insight into the team and into his preparations for free agency. Thats right, all 7 foot 3 inches of Zydrunas Ilgauskus will be checking in from time to as a guest blogger here on The Black Converse. We couldn't be more excited.

Detroit Pistons

Tayshaun and Rip Hamilton remain all that is left from the D that was in Detroit. The hallmark of the 3 different Detroit championship teams was their defensive prowess. Even in the biggest stretch, Ben Gordon and Charlie Villanueva would never be the missing pieces that would bolster a team defense. So a blue collar team in a blue collar city abandons its blue collar roots. At least they aren't making an electric engine Camaro.
With little interest in how this season plays out for the Pistons, it reminded us here of another Detroit native; Kid Rock. Our level of caring for the Pistons this season is proportional to our level of caring what happens with Kid Rock. We believe the parallels between Kid Rock and the Detroit Pistons don't end there.

Indiana Pacers

Danny Granger will score a lot of points. The Pacers will play 5 white guys at one time. Nobody will think twice about the Pacers as a legitimate threat to make the playoffs. But they did draft Tyler Hansbrough, or Psycho T as he is more affectionately know around here. We have decided to create a Psycho T Intensity Tracker. We will check in periodically to see where the Intensity Nobs have been turned to and with any luck he will turn them up to 11 this year.

Milwaukee Bucks

"There is nothing to see here. Move along."
Don't think Obi-wan Kenobi was talking about this year's Bucks team? You're right. He was talking about every Bucks team since Ray Allen and Big Dog. Unless hell freezes over, or thaws out if you are a Bucks fan, the only thing remotely interesting about this organization is Bango the Buck and his Tales of Intrigue.